Thème

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Thème
Message de zlabn posté le 21-09-2026 à 22:03:55 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir,
Pourriez-vous corriger le thème que je propose pour le texte suivant ?
En vous remerciant.

Texte :
Me voici à Paris depuis onze jours déjà ! J’avoue ne pas encore y avoir été heureuse. Je n’ai aucune joie. Aucune.

J’ai appris l’autre jour la mort de Jock. Je ne peux dire combien cela m’a fait de la peine. Je savais que je ne le reverrais jamais, mais j’espérais tout de même. Il a été tué en Italie, dans la région de Cassino, je crois. Il était dans une Jeep et il a été décapité. Pauvre Jock, il était paraît-il, adoré de tout le monde ; quand les autres parlaient tranquillement de sa mort, ils ne se rendaient pas compte de ce que cela me faisait. Maintenant je suis sûre de ne plus le retrouver sur le front, de ne plus le rencontrer dans la rue, de ne plus recevoir une lettre de lui et je suis aussi triste que le premier jour. Jock est le seul être que j’ai jamais aimé. L’autre soir, lorsque j’étais au Lido, j’avais envie de pleurer. Tous ces gens qui dansaient me donnaient mal au cœur. Je voyais Jock dans son cercueil. Je l’imaginais comme j’en avais vu tant d’autres et je trouvais ça horrible. C’est vrai, j’ai failli pleurer.

Depuis que je suis à Paris, j’ai revu un tas de vieux amis, mais à tous j’avais envie de dire : “Ce n’est pas vous que je voudrais voir, c’est Jack”

Traduction :

I have been in Paris for eleven days so far ! I admit that I haven’t been happy there yet. I don’t feel any joy. Not at all.

Last day, I heard about Jack’s death. I can’t describe how sad I am about it. I knew I won’t see him anymore, but hope hadn’t disappeared. He was killed in Italy, in the region of Cassino, I think. He was in a Jeep and was decapitated. Poor Jack Jack, it seems that he was loved by everybody; others didn’t know how I felt when they calmly talked about his death. Now, I am sure that I won’t find him on the front again, that I won’t meet him in the street, that I won’t receive any letter from him and I am as sad as the first day. Jack is the only being that I have ever loved. Last night, when I was at the Lido, I wanted to cry. Those people dancing hurt my heart. I was seeing Jack in his coffin. I imagined him as I saw so many others and I found it horrible. It’s true, I was about to cry.

I have seen plenty of old friends ever since I have been in Paris, but I want to tell them all : “I wish I could see Jack rather than you”

Réponse : Thème de gerondif, postée le 22-09-2026 à 10:43:20 (S | E)
Bonjour
Erreurs en bleu

Traduction :
Pourquoi remplacer Jock par Jack ?
I have been in Paris for eleven days so far ! I admit that I haven’t been happy there yet. I don’t feel any joy. Not at all.

Last day, I heard about Jack’s death. I can’t describe how sad I am (temps) about it. I knew I won’t(le texte français est au conditionnel, pas au futur) see him anymore, but hope hadn’t disappeared. He was killed in Italy, in the region of Cassino, I think. He was in a Jeep and was decapitated. Poor Jack Jack, it seems that he was loved by everybody; others didn’t know how I felt when they calmly talked about his death. Now, I am sure that I won’t find him on the front again, that I won’t meet him in the street, that I won’t receive any letter from him and I am as sad as the first day. Jack is the only being that I have ever loved. Last night, when I was at the Lido, I wanted to cry. Those people dancing hurt my heart. I was seeing Jack in his coffin. I imagined him as I saw so many others and I found it horrible. It’s true, I was about to cry.

I have seen plenty of old friends ever since I have been(temps. normalement, on met le present perfect dans la phrase et un prétérit derrière since) in Paris, but I want (temps.)to tell them all : “I wish I could see Jack rather than you”

Si je traduisais ce texte, d'autres structures ou interprétations, insistances que les vôtres me viendraient en tête. Parfois, j’interprète plus que je ne traduis.

It's already been eleven days since I arrived in Paris. I must admit I haven't found any happiness there yet. I can find no joy / I can't find any joy. None at all.

I heard about / I was told about/ Jock's death the other day.I can hardly say how much it grieved me. I knew I would never ever see him again but I still hoped I would all the same. He was killed in Italy, in the Cassino area, I think. He was in a jeep and he was decapitated. Poor Jock ! Everybody loved him, apparently. When the others nonchalantly discussed his death, they didn't realize how much it affected me. I am now certain (I now realize / I have now come to realize that)) I will no longer meet him again on the frontline, or bump into him on the street, or receive a letter from him, and it makes me as sad as on the first day. Jock is the only human being I have ever loved. The other night, when I was at the Lido, I felt like crying. All those people dancing made my heart cringe / made me sick / made me uneasy / made me feel like throwing-up. I pictured Jock in his coffin. I imagined him as I had seen so many others and I found that horrible. True to say,/honestly/ I must confess/ I nearly cried / I nearly broke down in tears.
Eversince I arrived in Paris, I have seen a great many friends again but I felt like saying to them all : It's Jock I would like to meet again, not you."

Depuis que je suis à Paris, j’ai revu un tas de vieux amis, mais à tous j’avais envie de dire : “Ce n’est pas vous que je voudrais voir, c’est Jack”

Il y a longtemps que je ne m'étais pas amusé à me livrer à ce type d'exercice. Pensée émue à Violet91 que j'aurais voulu voir commenter ce travail.

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