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texte sur les vampir...besoin d'aide
Message de milla posté le 02-12-2007 à 17:52:34 (S | E | F | I)
salut
Je n'ai pas de super notes en anglais cette année est-ce que vous pourriez me corriger les faute ou me donner des conseils, je dois rédiger la suite d'un dialogue ou le vampire raconte un moment de sa vie, il est le seul à parler, un journaliste l'enregistre :
" A long time ago, when I was a young boy I lived quietly in a small town. My father went at home's late in the night and each evening I was waiting him. A full moon night , I wasn't seeing my father but another man.First I saw a long slim shade with a finely tailored black coat? When I could to see him, I saw brilliants green eyes, like flames, his skin was smooth : he was that I am now. I couldn't moving but I'll never forget what he said : " I was like you and you'll be like me " I was so much scared than you're boy, maybe more. After that I didn't understand how he changed into bat and he went. I was surprising but mostly frightened and worried, I hadn't had cold so much before. I don't know how many time after, I felt a hand and then long and sharpened teeth. I was dissolving but I was hot. Some time after I understood he had drunk my blood. I never saw again that odd man. Next, each night for waiting my father I needed to go drink blood, more and more blood. One night, I hadn't seen anyone so I drank my mother's blood..."
Voilà
Merci
Si vous pouviez me signalerl es erreurs de formulation, de temps ou je sais ..ce qui va pas
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Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2007 17:58
Il est demandé aux membres qui auront la gentillesse de répondre de signaler les fautes, d'aider le demandeur à se corriger mais de ne jamais faire le travail à sa place.
Cette règle est incontournable sur ce site d'aprentissage.
Merci de votre participation.
Message de milla posté le 02-12-2007 à 17:52:34 (S | E | F | I)
salut Je n'ai pas de super notes en anglais cette année est-ce que vous pourriez me corriger les faute ou me donner des conseils, je dois rédiger la suite d'un dialogue ou le vampire raconte un moment de sa vie, il est le seul à parler, un journaliste l'enregistre :
" A long time ago, when I was a young boy I lived quietly in a small town. My father went at home's late in the night and each evening I was waiting him. A full moon night , I wasn't seeing my father but another man.First I saw a long slim shade with a finely tailored black coat? When I could to see him, I saw brilliants green eyes, like flames, his skin was smooth : he was that I am now. I couldn't moving but I'll never forget what he said : " I was like you and you'll be like me " I was so much scared than you're boy, maybe more. After that I didn't understand how he changed into bat and he went. I was surprising but mostly frightened and worried, I hadn't had cold so much before. I don't know how many time after, I felt a hand and then long and sharpened teeth. I was dissolving but I was hot. Some time after I understood he had drunk my blood. I never saw again that odd man. Next, each night for waiting my father I needed to go drink blood, more and more blood. One night, I hadn't seen anyone so I drank my mother's blood..."
Voilà
Merci
Si vous pouviez me signalerl es erreurs de formulation, de temps ou je sais ..ce qui va pas
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2007 17:58
Il est demandé aux membres qui auront la gentillesse de répondre de signaler les fautes, d'aider le demandeur à se corriger mais de ne jamais faire le travail à sa place.
Cette règle est incontournable sur ce site d'aprentissage.
Merci de votre participation.
