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Correction of a text on a trip
Message de loupevivante posté le 28-03-2009 à 16:20:09 (S | E | F)
Could you correct my mistakes in this text please? Tahnk you...I really need your help...please!
By that summer evening, I came back to my house at the same time as sun colored the sky red before giving in to bequeath his privileged place to his dear friend, moon, for the night. When I saw, from the end of the street, that scene brilliantly directed by my dear parents, a smile decorated my face and my shiny eyes conveyed, in a very no subtle way, the happiness I felt in my young heart at that moment. Although they didn’t have pronounced a single word, several fantastic scenarios took already place in my mind thanks to my fertile and tireless childlike imagination. The next morning, just before the sunrise would shine down on our marvelous world, that life would spring up again in every home, my family and I would made our way towards Prince-Eduard-Island.
That specific night seemed to stretch on too many hours, more than it was used to be, because of that uncontrollable feeling which monopolized my mind. In brief, I was incapable to keep my shirt on. What represented my dreams last night became, for the time being, my reality. Travelling up and down that part of the country, I could appreciate, for the first time in my whole life, the rising sun. I touched that red earth which covered every parcel of that island, I tasted the fresh and particular taste of seafood which were that place traditional meal, I crossed the Confederation bridge which represented that province’s renown… In short, I opened my eyes on an important reality: you can just visit your neighboring to discover the more beautiful thing that our world carries.
All in all, I discovered that the world was bigger than what I believe in. I became aware of the cultural distinction just by travelling around eight hundred kilometers away my routine. From that trip, I learned that life could be improvised sometime, that we could let go some details, and everything would be right even if! I discovered that the more beautiful life’s episodes spring from that kind of unexpected adventures.
Message de loupevivante posté le 28-03-2009 à 16:20:09 (S | E | F)
Could you correct my mistakes in this text please? Tahnk you...I really need your help...please!
By that summer evening, I came back to my house at the same time as sun colored the sky red before giving in to bequeath his privileged place to his dear friend, moon, for the night. When I saw, from the end of the street, that scene brilliantly directed by my dear parents, a smile decorated my face and my shiny eyes conveyed, in a very no subtle way, the happiness I felt in my young heart at that moment. Although they didn’t have pronounced a single word, several fantastic scenarios took already place in my mind thanks to my fertile and tireless childlike imagination. The next morning, just before the sunrise would shine down on our marvelous world, that life would spring up again in every home, my family and I would made our way towards Prince-Eduard-Island.
That specific night seemed to stretch on too many hours, more than it was used to be, because of that uncontrollable feeling which monopolized my mind. In brief, I was incapable to keep my shirt on. What represented my dreams last night became, for the time being, my reality. Travelling up and down that part of the country, I could appreciate, for the first time in my whole life, the rising sun. I touched that red earth which covered every parcel of that island, I tasted the fresh and particular taste of seafood which were that place traditional meal, I crossed the Confederation bridge which represented that province’s renown… In short, I opened my eyes on an important reality: you can just visit your neighboring to discover the more beautiful thing that our world carries.
All in all, I discovered that the world was bigger than what I believe in. I became aware of the cultural distinction just by travelling around eight hundred kilometers away my routine. From that trip, I learned that life could be improvised sometime, that we could let go some details, and everything would be right even if! I discovered that the more beautiful life’s episodes spring from that kind of unexpected adventures.
