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Correction d'un texte anglais (danse (1)

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Correction d'un texte anglais (danse
Message de pauppau posté le 06-05-2009 à 21:19:17 (S | E | F)

Bonsoir,
J'ai rédigé un texte en anglais et j'ai peut-être fait quelques erreurs.. Pouvez vous me corriger svp s'il vous plaît ??
Je vous remercie d'avance
Pauline


Every end of year, there was the great school performance in which each class had to dance in front of an audience essentially composed of parents. I enjoyed these celebrations because it was an opportunity to dance and I was often in the first row of pupils for the dance. It was very stressful because I knew that the other pupils looked at the first row to be sure of the dance's moves. So I couldn't make mistakes on steps otherwise the dance would have gone wrong. In spite of this stress, I felt proud because I had a kind of responsability.

Last year, I discovered rock'n'roll : a real love at first sight. This kind of dance is practised in couple so it's interesting because the girl has to adpat to each new partner and to understand whichpass he wants to make. I love it because thre's a real exchange between the two persons and each time I change of partner for a new dance, I discover a new way of dancing. It's really rewarding. Moreover, I love to listen to pop-rock music and with rock'n'roll I find a way to dance on it. Finally I prefer this kind of dance to hiphop because there's less competition between dancers.In fact, when I danced hiphop, it was especially steps the ones after the others and all dancers hope to be the "best" in order to be in the first row for example. But with rock'n'roll, there isn't competition, dancers are in coupe, moves are more improvized and we don't have time to take care of others couples. That's why I love dancing rock'n'rollsomuch and I'm not ready to stop it.

Moreover, I like going to night clubs where I'm used to dance until the end of the night. Even if it's true that I don't like the ambiance because most of people are used to frequent night clubs more to chat up than to dance.

Last but not least, I'm keen on dancing alone in my bedroom watching videos in order to learn new steps trying to undestand how other people do.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 06-05-2009 22:01


Réponse: Correction d'un texte anglais (danse de laure95, postée le 07-05-2009 à 12:01:08 (S | E)
Bonjour, voici ce que tu dois corriger:
Every end of year, there was (présent) the great school performance in which each class had to (pourquoi l'obligation?) dance in front of an audience essentially composed of parents. I enjoyed (présent) these celebrations because it was (temps) an opportunity to dance and I was (temps) often in the first row of pupils for the dance. It was (temps) very stressful because I knew (temps) that the other pupils looked at the first row to be sure of the dance's moves. So I couldn't (obligation) make any mistakes on steps otherwise the dance would have gone wrong. In spite of this stress, I felt proud because I had a kind of responsability.

Last year, I discovered rock'n'roll : a real love at first sight. This kind of dance is practised in couple so it's interesting because the girl has to adpat herself to each new partner and to understand whichpass he wants to make. I love it because thre's a real exchange between the two persons and each time I change of partner for a new dance, I discover a new way of dancing. It's really rewarding. Moreover, I love to listen (gérondif) to pop-rock music and with rock'n'roll I find a way to dance on it. Finally I prefer this kind of dance to hiphop because there's less competition between dancers.In fact, when I danced hiphop, it was especially steps the ones after the others and all dancers hope to be the "best" in order to be in the first row for example. But with rock'n'roll, there isn't any competition, dancers are in couple, moves are more improvized and we don't have time to take care of others couples. That's why I love dancing rock'n'rollsomuch and I'm not ready to stop it.

Pourquoi utlises-tu si souvent le prétérit (temps du passé)?

Moreover, I like going to night clubs where I'm used to dance until the end of the night. Even if it's true that I don't like the ambiance because most of people are used to frequent night clubs more to chat up than to dance.

Last but not least, I'm keen on dancing alone in my bedroom watching videos in order to learn new steps trying to undestand how other people do.




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