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Correction- présentation
Message de hommelama posté le 21-09-2009 à 20:27:19 (S | E | F)
bonjour, quelqu'un peu il me corriger svp mon devoir est de me présenter et il doit faire environ 150 mots :
My name is eliot . I was born on the 3rd november 1994 so, i am 14. I live in truchtersheim. I like computers and going out with my friends. I have one sister her name is sidney and she is 20 years old, she is extremely rude, impationt, selfish and not realy hard-working. My father is a business manager and my mother too. Im easily scared and irresponsible but my principal qualities are patience and sociability. However, I like so much sleeping. I am keen in computer science subjects, so i would like to keep studying computer science . My favourite topic is maths because it’s the only one Im good but i try to do my best for the other ones ! My hobbies are golf and vidéo games. I like going to the pictures and my favourite film director is Quentin Tarantino.
Message de hommelama posté le 21-09-2009 à 20:27:19 (S | E | F)
bonjour, quelqu'un peu il me corriger svp mon devoir est de me présenter et il doit faire environ 150 mots :
My name is eliot . I was born on the 3rd november 1994 so, i am 14. I live in truchtersheim. I like computers and going out with my friends. I have one sister her name is sidney and she is 20 years old, she is extremely rude, impationt, selfish and not realy hard-working. My father is a business manager and my mother too. Im easily scared and irresponsible but my principal qualities are patience and sociability. However, I like so much sleeping. I am keen in computer science subjects, so i would like to keep studying computer science . My favourite topic is maths because it’s the only one Im good but i try to do my best for the other ones ! My hobbies are golf and vidéo games. I like going to the pictures and my favourite film director is Quentin Tarantino.
Réponse: Correction- présentation de hommelama, postée le 21-09-2009 à 20:41:57 (S | E)
upppppp
Réponse: Correction- présentation de laure95, postée le 22-09-2009 à 11:14:33 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Ta rédaction est pas mal du tout!Voici quelques petites choses à revoir:
My name is eliot (majuscule) . I was born on the 3rd november 1994 so, i (majuscule) am 14. I live in truchtersheim (tu es fâché avec les majuscules?). I like computers and going out with my friends. I have one sister (mettre
her name is sidney (majuscule) and she is 20 years old, (mettre 1 point) she is extremely rude, impationt (faute de frappe?), selfish and not realy hard-working. My father is a business manager and my mother too (so is my mother). Im (I'm) easily scared ? and irresponsible but my principal (main)qualities are patience and sociability. However, I like so much sleeping (inverser l'ordre des mots). I am keen in (on) computer science subjects, so i would like to keep studying computer science . My favourite topic is maths because it’s the only one Im good in but i try to do my best for the other ones ! My hobbies are golf and vidéo (jamais d'accent en anglais) games. I like going to the pictures and my favourite film director is Quentin Tarantino. Réponse: Correction- présentation de exprofefl, postée le 22-09-2009 à 12:47:56 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Au lieu de dire «However, I like sleeping so much» je dirais «However, I like sleeping very much» ou même plus familier «However, something else I really like to do is sleep».
Cordialement,
exprofefl
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